Hair Affair

I want to admit something:  I have loved my hair most of my adult life.  I know, that can be taken as shallow, but there it is.  I have loved the color, I love the thickness, I love that it grows fast and is generally healthy.  And I like it long.  I like to curl it. I like to put it in two braids on a hot summer day. I like to throw it into a ponytail and forget about it.  I guess maybe I feel younger and prettier with long hair.

So imagine the difficult decision it was to cut it all off today.  First, let me show you a couple of pictures:

My hair was long! But it was also unhealthy and so much thinner than it's ever been in my life.

The second photo it to show you the state of my hair. Notice the short hair and frizz?  Since my health took a turn for the worse a few years ago, I am still coming to realize all the different aspects of my body that it has affected.  My hair falls out like crazy!  At any moment I can run my fingers through my hair and find my fingers filled with stray hair.  Because of the malnourishment in my body, it pulled in on itself and sent the needed vitamins to the vital functions of my body.  My hair was not one of those.  So, now that I am working toward better health, my hair is growing back in.  I have a lot of frizz and short hairs.

Why do I mention all this on my health journey blog?  I want you to think about your health as a whole.  My hair is actually another symbol of this journey.

We all want to be happy and content in life.  We may really like the life we have, feeling at peace with the way things are going.  And then something happens that knocks you off your axis.  You try desperately to keep it all together, to cling to every aspect of your life that you can still control.  Like my hair:  My hair was 'fine', right?  I'm not saying it is wrong to keep hold of things that you still find joy in, that still help you to feel there is some normalcy about your life. We all have to figure out these different aspects in our own way.

For me, this was one of the steps I needed to take.  It was the next thing I needed to do to bring further healing to by body as a whole.  If I want my hair healthy, I needed to cut it off and let it 'heal'.  For me it is a symbol:  What am I willing to do to bring about what I truly want?  

What I want?  I want to be here for my kids, fully engaged in their lives.  I want to travel with my husband.  I want to have energy to serve the Lord in the way I know He needs me to.  I want to hike, to waterski, to enjoy the world around me.  I want to be present.  And I want to be healthy.  To do all these things that are important, really important, to me, I have learned to sacrifice some unessential things for things that are essential for my body.  I loved homemade wheat bread, but it was not for my body.  I loved popcorn, but my body says no.  These are not essential for my body to live.  I have found other things that bring the health I desire.  It's okay to let things go.

That is why my hair is a symbol.  I am willing to let go of something I love for something in the future that could be even better for me.  Besides, it's just hair, right? 😏